Come Fly With Me
by thedeepestsecretnobodyknows
Summary: When Natalie Teeger goes missing, Adrian Monk fights to find her, keep her safe and above all, keep her sane. AdrianXNatalie - rating may go up
1. Chapter 1

_DISCLAIMER: I do not own anything (including any characters) in USA's Monk. _

Hello, readers. I'm glad you showed a keen interest in my story. I hope you like it very much but please do not be too harsh, it is my first attempt to a Monk story, especially since it will be centered around Adrain and Natalie's relationship. Enjoy!

* * *

It had been almost three days since Natalie said she'd be back in town. Julie had even called to ask Adrian if he'd heard anything from her mother, however, he deflated her curious questions with all the wrong answers. He hadn't heard or seen any sight of Natalie since she left for a vacation in Miami, Florida.

"Mr. Monk," Julie quickly distressed over the line, "you don't think anything's happened, do you? I mean, she usually calls me every morning and every night and she hasn't called since yesterday morning."

"I know, I know, that-that doesn't sound like her at all. I'll see what I can do. I'll call you back when I can."

After hanging up it was impervious for him to start to worry. Something wrong happened and he felt it in his gut. And oddly enough, it was the same gut feeling he got when Trudy hadn't come home from running errands for Ambrose all those years before.

Something peeled him open from the inside out and it started to churn his stomach. He flittered around, cleaning to get his mind off things but he knew he should call the Captian or someone who know what to do.

"This is Stottlemayer?"

"Hey, Captain, it's Monk."

"Oh, hey buddy, what can I do for you?"

"It's Natalie, I think she's gone missing."

"Monk she said she'd be back in a few days, you were holding up good for the last three days, what could be wrong now?"

"Captain, she said she'd be home two days ago, around 5:30 after her plane landed. She isn't home and she hasn't been calling Julie. She's worried about her. And now I am." Adrian tried very hard to swallow in his fear. He couldn't imagine losing Natalie. Not now and not like this.

"What? That isn't like her."

"I know. What do we do?"

"…Let me call you back. I'll figure something out."

* * *

It had been six hours since Adrian called the Captain and two hours since Julie called back. Now he was gut wrenching nervous, so nervous that his habits and cleaning ticks were starting to consume him all over again when he couldn't find anything to do with himself or his spare time. He hadn't eaten all day but that wasn't really an issue. It was Natalie. She was…something was, very, very wrong.

The telephone rang and he jolted to it.

"Monk?"

"Yes, Captain."

"Look, the best thing you can do is wait this out. If she's not back by tomorrow, you call me and we'll take a little trip to Florida. Natalie isn't negligent towards Julie and she certainly wouldn't leave you to yourself for more than a week. You understand? I can't just assume something went wrong, so tomorrow, if she doesn't call or show, we'll get this sorted out. But it might be best if Julie stay out of this mess until we know something."

"Yes-yes. Alright."

* * *

Tomorrow came and sat on Monk's doorstep on what seemed like forever. The hours were agonizing and Julie's helpless attempts to remain calm were driving her insane. Her mother had failed to call at all during the day either. Monk was becoming restless and unhinged due to Natalie's seemingly disappearance.

"She still hasn't called? Or shown up?" Captain Stottlemayer asked over the line.

"No, sir." Adrian sighed hopelessly.

"Well," Stottlemayer sighed, before he looked over at Lt. Disher, who twirled in his chair, and said to the phone, "looks like we're taking a trip to Florida."

* * *

"You know," A nasal like voice piped in beside Natalie's ear, frightening her, "it's less painful if you don't try to struggle."

She tried hard to keep her nerves intact and her thoughts calm but the persistent stroking, of his thick callouced fingers, up and down her thighs were none too reassuring. The man's sharp nails caressed her hip bone before they traced along her navel, leading up to the curve of her neck.

"Please," She managed to muffle in between the cloth that gagged her mouth, "please. Stop. Please, just stop."

The man grasped her chin and squeezed.

"I'm not done with you, just. Yet." He pronounced. He allowed his eyes to wash over her naked body before dragging her into a dark, adjcent room.

Natalie let out a muffled scream before the door was slammed shut.

* * *

I hope you liked the first chapter :) I will update soon with a little inspiration from you reviewers!


	2. Chapter 2

_DISCLAIMER: I do not own anything (including any of the characters) in USA's Monk. _

Wow, I wasn't expecting such speedy & positive responses! It made me want to go ahead and give you another update very quickly :) Anyways, I hope you enjoy this next installment!

* * *

Captain Stottlemayer was eyeing Randy very peculiarly when he had changed his shirt to a very floral, bright colored one draping very lazily over a pair of cargo shorts and on his feet a pair of flip flops. Randy smirked and put on a pair of shades.

"You like it?" He asked upbeat. Stottlemayer sighed and snatched his shades off.

"Randy, this isn't a vacation. We are here to find Natalie." He said very sternly rubbing his temples. He looked over a Monk who was preoccupied with the airplane tags on their luggage. Apparently they were bent up and beaten on the ride down here. He sighed approaching him.

"Monk." He said.

"Hm." Adrian mused absently minded, trying to straighten the tags.

"Monk." Stottlemayer bent over beside him and tapped him on the shoulder.

"Forget the tags Monk. We're here to find Natalie, okay? Come on." He said before he grabbed his own suitcase.

Monk snapped out his OCD for a moment and watched Randy and the Captain take their bags.

"Captain, Julie told me she was staying at Loews Miami Beach Hotel." Monk said.

"Wow, five stars. Right near to beach itself. How'd she afford it? That place is expensive." Disher piped in.

"Randy, where is that anyway? Didn't you get the address?" Stottlemayer asked, as they received the key to a rent car they were given.

"Uh. Yea, yea right here. It says, 1601 Collins Ave."

"Good, good. Let's hurry up and ask the staff of that place if they know anything."

* * *

"Can I help you?" An attendee asked at the front desk. Stottlemayer pushed himself forward and offered his Police Badge to the lady.

"Excuse me, " Monk bumped in front of the Captain, he was anxious.

"We're looking for a woman, about this tall," He demonstrated with his hand, "blonde hair, blue eyes. She was only suppose to stay here"—

"Monk." Stottlemayer intruppted, "He's with me. Look, did a Mrs. Teeger ever sign in here? Have you seen her around?"

"Uh, I'm not sure. Let me check. I'll get you a Manager right away."

After a few minutes of relentless waiting, someone appeared, a tall man appeared, dark and handsome and greeted them.

"You're working with San Francisco police, right? Is something wrong?"

"Yes, we're looking for a Natalie Teeger. She was suppose to have checked in here about five days ago."

"Hmm. Yes, we had her come in but she hasn't checked out yet. Her day to leave was today, about two hours ago. Her bill will be expensive if she doesn't hurry soon."

"Not to rain on your parade for the so called expensive rate she'll have to pay up front but you haven't noticed she's been missing for two days? I mean, you haven't called or anything? What's wrong with you?" Monk said distastefully from behind the Captain. Randy eyed the Captain carefully.

"Sir, I'm sorry. Some people who come here just want a good time and don't show up for a couple days until they have to leave. It hasn't come to our attention she's been missing until now. I apologize." The man intervened.

"Look, can we have a copy of her room key then? We might have to search her room for anything that might help us to find her." Stottlemayer asked.

"Sure. No problem." The man nodded and fetched the room key, "I sincerely hope no misfortune has found it's way to her, sir." He said to Monk as Stottlemayer was handed the key.

* * *

Her thighs ached. Everytime she tried to move her legs she feel the layer of dried blood in her inner flesh chaff off. It made her crindge. The very thought of his body on top of her again made her eyes water. Something felt like it was dying inside of her. The way his hands handled her hadn't made her feel ever so filthy!

The only person she could think about was Julie. How awful of a mother she's appeared to her now?

Why on earth did she agree to meet with him again? She knew her brother couldn't be trusted and now he's gone and fed her to wolves all because he couldn't pay the man. She'd be the prize piece hanging on his wall, her memory in platinum gold while her cold, dead, dank body would be carved out of the sand by the time Adrian or anybody else knew she'd gone missing.

Who knew she would miss him this terribly? His quirky antics of cleaning. She actually missed the way he smelled too –always clean. He was always so very gentle, even if he could be a real ass-hole, she actually missed the way he acted. And she really missed looking at him. His warm brown eyes always melted her cold, ice blue ones.

"Please," She sobbed silently, "if anyone can find me, please, Adrian, find me before he kills me."

* * *

"Monk, do you notice anything?" Stottlemayer stood, watching Adrian lift his fingers, slowly taking in the room. He bounced from one end to the other and sadly, couldn't find any sign of struggle. Something was wrong…

"Something's wrong. There's no sign of a struggle. Could she have left to do something, or meet someone and intercepted"—

He paused seeing a piece of ripped back sitting, tucked very snugly behind the alarm clock on the table beside the bed. Monk pulled out his tweezers and extracted it.

"

_7:30 PM Thursday – Pizza Rustica_

"

It was scribbled on very neatly, cursive of course and it was surely Natalie's hand writing.

"What'd you find, buddy?" Stottelmayer asked.

"I think –I think she was meeting someone." Monk handed it to the Captain.

* * *

"Have you seen her?" Stottlemayer asked, presenting a recent picture of Natalie to one of the hostesses.

"Yes, she was here about two nights ago. She was meeting with Johnny."

"Johnny? Who is that?"

"Johnathan Davenport? Why he's the biggest coke heads on this side of Miami. He's gotten into a lot of trouble here lately. How the hell don't you know that?"

"Mam –did-did you say, Davenport?" Monk intervened.

"Yeah."

"Then-then that must've been her brother." Adrian whispered to himself.

"What?" Stottlemayer asked.

"That-that must be Natalie's brother. She's never mentioned him" Adrian answered. "Probably for good reason." He whispered to himself.

"Is something wrong? I have a job you know." The waitress became impatient.

"Here's the thing"—Monk was interrupted.

"Look, under these terms, we're gunna have to investigate." Stottlemayer flashed his badge.

"Can you remember anything about that night? Something bad or anything?" Monk intervened again, cutting in front of the Captain.

"I wouldn't know. I wasn't their server but I think Audrina would. She was serving them then, I think."

"Thank-you." Adrian said pushing through Randy and Stottlemayer.

* * *

"Don't talk back." The man commanded harshly before slapping Natalie.

"Crying won't change a thing, sweet cheeks. You're just gunna have to deal with the fact. You were set up and now you're paying the price for your dumbass brother. Johnny? Whoo! What a fuck up?" The man was practically talking down to her. He was wrapping his large hands around Natalie's throat crushing her wind pipe. She flailed helplessly under his grip. He suddenly dropped her on the floor.

"He sure got in deep but come on, what can better than paying in cash when you deal out your own kin? Blood's thicker than water sweet heart and believe me, I ain't done with you. Yet." He smacked her hard. Blood started to bubble from her nose and mouth as she gasped for air.

"I mean, you're like my little punching bag. I can take out all my frustrations on you and you know what's better than that?" He teased, picking her up by her hair and tossing her on the bed again, "I can also get whatever pleasure," He crawled on top of her again, kissing her neck viciously, "whenever," He pushed her hard against the headboard, making her yelp, "I want it. You're probably the best payment that boy's ever given me. Hehe. Don't worry, before I kill you I'll make for damn sure you'll be put to good use."

* * *

"Yea, they met for about fifteen minutes before she threw up her hands and stormed out of here." Audrina answered.

"Do you know what about? Like what started it?"

"Look, I'll tell you a little something about Johnny. He's not a nice kid, yeah, sure he'll come around and act sweet but the boy's been in debt to his drug dealer, Grim, for about three years. And he's lucky he's still alive. And that Natalie girl, when she walked in, we all knew why. He was asking her for money. And when she said no, he went stark crazy. Chased after her and all. They were fighting and screaming in the parking lot. After that, I don't know. I know they started talking and he hopped in her car but that's all. They jetted out of here quick." Audrina whispered.

Monk nodded and felt the pit of his stomach flop. Sweat started forming on his forehead and he could only imagine what happened. Something was going on, right now, he expected, something bad was unfolding on Natalie and what was he doing? Sitting in a pizza parlor. He was absolutely winded and upset he could hardly concentrate. It was until then that Stottlemayer had to drag him out of there.

"Look, Monk," Stottlemayer put his hand on Monk's shoulder, "We'll find her okay, but for now you need to calm down and concentrate. I saw how you were looking in there, almost the same look when you found out about Trudy. Don't breakdown here, okay? We will find her. You got it?"

"Yea, yea. Yea. Yea." Monk repeated over and over again. He was constantly tugging at his buttons, fearing they weren't straight but his mind kept going back to Natalie. He was so afriad for her. What if he never saw her again? He shuddered to think, swallowing hard.

"Sir!" Audrina, the waitress came running out. She held a black coat.

" I know it might not be much but Johnny, he –he left this here the other night. The manager kept it."

Monk simply looked at the coat and didn't take it. Stottlemayer nodded and took it for him nodding at Audrina who eyed Monk weirdly.

"Thank-you." Randy answered watching her go back in the Pizzeria. Stottlemayer shoved him causing Randy to look concerned and serious. He longer eyed the waitress and became solemn.

Adrian's mind went blank and his stomach filled up with gall. His tongue started tasting bitter and his eyes rolled back in fourth. Natalie was in danger. He couldn't get her face out his mind, almost as obsessively as he was when Trudy died. And then something frightened him –could he have possibly grown attatched to her –to Natalie? Oh god, now he felt worse than ever. The betrayal sunk below his veins, making his body feel heavier than lead and mind bubble with apprehension. He felt horrible about it. Suddenly he noticed someone had been tapping him on the shoulder.

"Monk-Monk! Monk, are you alright?"

"Yea-yea. I'm fine. Fine. Fine."

"Well lookie here –looks like we just found his little schedule –well not much of a schedule hehe" Stottlemayer joked, pulling out a ripped piece of notebook paper, "He's suppose to be checking in with his probation officer in about –fifteen minutes."

* * *

Well I hope this has got you hooked :) I do sincerely apologize for any spelling and/or grammatical errors. Oh, I hope I am not making Monk become too out of character, just trying to give him a little more empathetic traits towards Natalie. If you like and wish for speedy continuation (or if in the event you have some pointers) do no hesitate to review!


	3. Chapter 3

_DISCLAIMER: I do not own anything (or any of the character) of USA's Monk_

Alright you guys, this is a pretty intense chapter, it sums up the mystery of Natalie's whereabouts and it all comes together. Hope you enjoy this update :) :)

* * *

Johnny was outside of his probationary officer's car when another car pulled up. He looked early to them as they stepped out. Johnny watched them approach and the Captain began adjusting his coat blazer, flashing his gun, which hung on his waist, accidentally. Johnny saw and it immediately began looking at his feet. He started biting his nails and fingers started to instantly sweat. The closer they came the more apprehension built in his throat.

"Johnny? Johnny what's the matter"-Suddenly, Johnny just booked it fast and hard.

"Hey Johnny –Johnny!" His officer called, then seeing Stottlemayer and Randy came running up to them as Johnny took off.

"Hey! Police –what are you"— the officer called before he was flashed by Randy and Stottlemayer's badges. He nodded but he eyed Monk weirdly seeing he no proper identification, much less authoritative I.D. but nonetheless they all ran after Johnny. Monk's feet flew as soon as they were hitting pavement and Adrian didn't even noticed the energy or air leaving his body. All he could concentrate on was Natalie's life.

Monk finally was in arm's length of Johnny when he fell on top of him, knocking him down on the sidewalk. People walking past only stared as the other officers caught up to Adrian who had on the ground.

"Where is she!" Monk called out.

"Who? What are you doing? Whatcha want with me –fuck!"

"You know who I'm talking about! You're sister –where is she? Where is Natalie?"

"I don't know who you talking about man!" Johnny refused to bust his cover. He simply played stupid. Stottlemayer stepped up and pulled Johnny off the ground. He showed him his badge.

"You better start figuring out who she is or you're gunna be in big trouble son –she's been missing for a couple days and we'd like very much to find her. Now."

Johnny was hesitant and just stuttered a few mumbled, incoherent words until his Probation Officer appeared. He looked none too happy either.

"Fuck."

"Johnny, you're already in enough trouble as it is so you might want to start talking."

"Goddamnit –fine! She's my sister, what else do you wanna know"—

"Here's the thing: You were the last one who saw her. You met her at Pizza Rustica Thursday night at 7:30. The server told us you and her had an altercation and you guys left. What happened after that?" Monk pronounced harshly.

Johnny rested at Stottlemayer lose touch and tried once more to break free when Randy suddenly pushed him up against the wall.

"Johnny, we know you're in debt already, okay? Don't play stupid with us. Just tell us where she is and maybe we'll drop charges. Now for the last time, where is she?" Randy cut it dry as he leaned on the kid.

"Alright! She's with Grim. I'm in deep, real deep so what could I do? Nothing's better payment than flesh and blood."

Monk's eyes twitched at such a remark.

"Excuse me? Flesh and blood? You mean to say you paid off your debt with Natalie's life?"

"What the hell is going on, Johnny! I thought you cut-off all contact with your dealer." His probation officer yelled, breaking out his cuffs.

"Look man! You don't understand. He was gunna kill me! I had to do something"—

"So you made your sister pay the price? Better Natalie then you, huh?" Stottlemayer growled.

"What was I supposed to do!" Johnny screamed.

"You're disgusting." Adrian snapped.

"Man, fuck you." Johnny talked back.

"Hey! I don't want to have to ask you again, where is she?" Randy exclaimed.

* * *

It had been almost six hours, well at least what Natalie estimated. It was probably dark outside now, she couldn't concentrate. Her bones and body ached with furious pain that she just lay there, half dead, half alive and half caring which side of the line she was on…Death, it seemed like such a sweet relief at the moment, anything to keep her agony at bay.

Natalie was crammed into a steel cage. Now all she could was wait. She counted her blessings knowing that this was truly the end and no one would ever know where she was. She had already heard the man was getting rid of her. He was tossing her out tonight in the bay. And ironically, she thought as she cried to herself, this is exactly how she feared she'd always die –by drowning.

She was suddenly blindfolded and gagged again before being picked up and tossed in the back of a pick-up truck. She could feel metal scraping against metal as she slid to the back. She could hear the man talking over the phone to someone before it went silent.

He was starting the truck. Natalie bit her tongue so hard it drew blood and she started to pray.

* * *

The Probation Officer offered to escort Captain Stottlemayer, Randy and Monk. He had to stay with Johnny under such accusations and decided to make sure he wouldn't try any funny business. Johnny sat in the front and led them to a cut out, dirt path. Just as they turned down the dirt path an orange, old beat up pick-up truck pulled out. A concealed figure waved at them. A few minutes later, as the road down the dusty road they pulled in an old apartment-like warehouse.

They all got out of the car and started to approach the abandoned warehouse and Johnny hesitated. He looked around and started to make his way outback. Monk watched him closely but kept his eyes on the building itself. It looked old and frail. He was at first afraid to go in, afraid of what he might find. Suddenly, just as the Captain and Randy went inside, Adrian followed Johnny out back. The Probation Officer followed as well.

When he came around the back, Johnny just stood there looking dumbfounded. Something felt terribly amiss, misconstrued, heavily broken and wielding a most gut wrenching bitter taste in Monk's stomach. He couldn't fathom why he overreacting like this but this warehouse looked empty, dead, as if they were missing something just by being here. He peered into the sky, hopeless and lost, watching dusk melt into blue and black clouds. There was an approaching storm.

"What is it?" Adrian asked.

"Look man, I don't know. He's gone. He's…"

"What do you mean gone"—

"Monk!" Stottlemayer called. He appeared out back from the door leading in and he held up something. Adrian could feel his soul leave him. Randy looked unhappy. Adrian left Johnny alone with Probation Officer outside.

"It's Natalie's..." Stottlemayer trailed off sadly.

Monk looked over her ripped blouse with wide, evasive scared eyes. Her jeans were covered in dirt and blood, dark blood. It was as if his mind was caught in a trance, he could imagine, in most horrible detail exactly what the man wanted from her. He looked up at them.

"What does it mean?"

"Monk I"—

Adrian pushed through them entering the building himself. He felt like a gently displaced, glowing figurine in such a dank, damp, dimly lit place. On the floor, it was trashed and plagued with papers, trash, bullets, broken needles and a couple pistols. It felt diseased and Monk felt his head spinning. Captain appeared beside him.

"Monk, no one is here but there is evidence that Natalie was here. We need to look around."

"Sure. Yea. Yes. Yes." He whispered, out of breath. He had to gain control.

"And Monk," Captain sighed, he looked serious and with the utmost concern, he placed a hand on Adrian's shoulder, "We will find her, maybe not at her best -but we will find her."

With that being said, Adrian followed him and Randy into two adjacent rooms and they appeared in equivalent disarray and damage but smaller than relative sized rooms. There was dirt and trash on the floors, discarded clothing, all smelling heavily of gasoline and oil. In one room there was a bathroom, smeared with grunge and stains on the mirror. The shower curtain was off-white with rips and tears. The toilet hadn't been flushed and ranked of a most awful smell. Adrian grasped his nose and flew into the next room. He gasped for air seeing a bed, much smaller than his own and he twirled and flew from anything that was in arm's length within touching him. He was filled with displeasure and disgust in this place. He almost tripped a couple times when walking about the bed but regained composure.

At last he took in full view and set up his hands on an invisible plane, on which he used to when analyzing any crime scene and took in every detail with flicker and twitch of his fingers. He moved delicately, seeing that the sheets on the small bed were in a mess, tattered and plagued with holes and cigarette burns. There was dirt matted into the pillows and covers, and as Adrian looked over it in a full sweep he noticed it was also stained with blood and various other wet stains...

"These bloodstains appear fresh." Monk commented bending over, looking more closely at them.

Randy and Captain looked at each other from the doorway and came beside Monk. They too saw the stains.

"But these...stains," Adrian couldn't exactly tell what the other wet stains were, "their old and drying."

"Yep." Stottlemayer knew what the stains were from and Randy looked nervously at Monk as if he was saying _don't ask what they're from, don't ask what they're from, don't ask what they're from. _

"You don't know what made these stains do you"-

"No idea, Monk. Notice anything else?" Captain was anxious to move past this. He looked around the room, as did Randy as well.

Monk still looked over the sheet and then found something shiny sticking out from the pillow. He quickly retracted his tweezers and extracted it. It was one of Natalie's diamond earrings. He stared at it for a moment, as if discovering something so horrible.

"Whatcha got there?"

"One of Natalie's earrings. These were her favorite ones...Why would she take it off?" He asked quietly. Randy and Stottlemayer glanced at each other wearily.

"She must've put up a good fight." Stottlemayer piped in quietly before entering through the bathroom and going into the other room. Adrian just stared at the earring and delicately put it in his coat pocket. He followed Randy into the other room with Stottlemayer.

* * *

"Johnny, what happened to you man? I thought you and Grim gave up that connection, why the hell would you"-

"Shh." Johnny silenced him as he squat on the ground. He noticed there were tire tracks in carving its way into the gravel and dirt. He noticed it was turned in a circle and then led out into the road. He felt lost and scared in that moment. He knew that Grim had left but now it was apparent that his sister was really missing.

He tried recalling on his memory of that night. Johnny sincerely didn't plan on trading his sister, in all actuality, he was just too scared. She was there and it seemed fool proof. The way Grim found her appealing, oh so attractive, the kind of girl Grim could only dream of having and when he demanded her over the money, Johnny just took it and ran. He wasn't really scared for his sister, he was coward, he knew that but when Natalie was taken from him he darted. He wouldn't be caught; he was too much of a scared puppy. But he did remember one thing about that night, something that made him believe that it wouldn't be the last encounter he'd have with Grim. He said it so sadistically, as he knocked his sister out cold, that when the words had rolled off his tongue, he could feel his own bones shiver, "_This very well may be the best payment you've given me Johnny boy, but when I'm done with her, casting this bitch out, I'm coming after you. So you better run fast and you better run far, boy, because I'm coming for ya. Heheheh." _

Then it hit him, "What did he mean?" He asked himself out loud as he stood.

"What?" His Officer looked confused.

"Cast out? What does that mean? God, I can't fucking think!" Johnny meshed his hands into his face and started to tremble. He should know this!

"Cast? What do you mean? Like, casting a line? You know, like-like uh...fishing? Casting a line?"

Just then Johnny remembered for the split second the orange truck pulling off the run they turned on earlier...

"Casting! That's it! That's it! The docks! The docks! That's where he's going! He's going to cast her! He's gunna fucking drown her!" Johnny exclaimed and an uncertain panic billowed up in throat and he darted for the warehouse closely followed by his Officer.

* * *

"Why would he need bait cage hooks? Isn't that used for fishing?" Monk asked as he squatted beside a casting and baiting tool box. He extracted the receipt beside the brand new, emptied and ripped packages of fishing and clamping cage hooks. Adrian was beginning to scared himself.

"These were just recently bought...at 5:50 pm today." Adrian trailed off as he stared at the receipt and saw that he also bought light reflecting lure. The man, Grim, had purchased six of them.

"Where are the lures?" Monk asked. He searched the tool box and found nothing and then it hit him. He dropped the receipt and stood quickly.

"Oh god," He shuddered. "Where's the cage? Captain, where's the cage!" Adrian started to quiver.

"What's wrong, Monk? I don't know. What does all that mean anyway? Maybe the guy like fishing."

"No! No, I think he was planning on pushing her out in the bay in hopes that when she'd drown that the lures would attract fi"-

Suddenly, Johnny burst into the room.

"Grim's gunna get rid of her by drowning her in the bay!"

The Captain and Randy all glanced fearfully at Monk and darted out the door. They all began running quickly to the front. They all rounded the front and found that the Probationary Officer already had started the car and waited for them the hop in.

Now Adrian truly felt out of touch with his senses, feeling so lost in a cesspool of corruption and disgust drowning in the failure of mankind. He was slowly losing faith in hopes that Natalie was alive at this point. How long were they there just to find this out? How much precious time had they had wasted only to find this much out?

He didn't feel in any kind of control, not for Natalie, not even for himself and he started to breath in quicker paces. Now his soul seemingly already left him. He cradled Natalie's clothing in his hands delicately and tried not to panic. Natalie was hurt. She must've been in pain. Now she's going to be disposed off? God, he thought, biting his lip, please don't let the last thing I see of her is her dead body. Don't let my last memory of Natalie be empty, glass eyes. Please, he thought sadly, _don't die on me_. _Let me be the one to save you_.

"What time is it, Randy?" The Captain asked as the Officer flared his lights and sped down the highway. He was on his patrol talkie, telling others to meet him at the docks just south of Storybook Rd.

"It's 6:31".

* * *

"I guess this is the end of the road, little lady," The guy whispered. He hadn't taken the sheet off the cage and Natalie only whimpered. Her body was beaten and cold as he carried her concealed. She could hear his footsteps hitting the wood of the deck. The harshness of the thick, foamed waves beating below her made her shiver. Her mouth started to go numb due to the gag wrapping around her mouth and throat. Suddenly Natalie heard nothing. Her eyes faded, even if they were concealed, and something let go inside her. She was ready, she knew, she was ready to drown. She couldn't take it anymore. Her body ached and it moaned. It rattled and banged into the steel cage grooves. It was in that moment that Natalie lay perfectly still and accepted her fate. She was content and her pain suddenly vanished. She was in darkness, calm, surrender in which she relaxed as she set down. The ocean hissed in the distance and she heard the crack of thunder above.

She could hear the sheet being removed but she did nothing. She just sat quiet and enjoying her acceptance of death. She couldn't speak; something was caught in her throat, making unable to speak, unable to breathe.

Above her was Grim. His silhouette was only illuminated by the lonely dock lamp that was set off in the distance. They were sitting at the end of the dock and he lit a cigarette. He took the liberty of blowing the foul smoke in her face and Natalie fell into a sudden darkness, a sweet and calming sleep.

* * *

Just so you know, Natalie isn't dead -okay? She was just overcome with exhaustion and fell suddenly asleep. Anyway, hope this was exciting. Can't wait to hear from you!


	4. Chapter 4

_DISCLAIMER: I do not own anything (including the characters [except "Grim" & "Johnny"]) from USA's Monk. _

Ahh, we've reached thus far to now finally endure probably one of the most intense (besides the last chapter of course) chapters of them all. I hope you enjoy and I really hope I didn't make it too complicated. I'm not really good writing "action packed" themes...er, whatever, I'm not very good at it so I apologize if you get confused. If in the case you do, do not hesitate to **constructively criticize. **

Alright, enough babble, ENJOY!

* * *

As Natalie sunk into a deep slumber, Grim continued smoking his cigarette. He started to whistle as he exhaled the dark, gray smoke and it whirled around his head. He watched it flutter into nothing. The cigarette was growing smaller and so was dwindling Natalie's time...

* * *

"Turn off your lights," Stottlemayer commanded when they approached the dock, "if we've got any chance at all, we don't need to scare him into finishing the job."

The probationary officer did so with a nod and they road up very slowly as their eyes landed on the end of the dock. There was a figure, a man dark within his shadow, sitting on top of a cage. Monk's eyes witnessed it, peering anxiously out the window. His eyes were drawn immediately to the cage underneath him and he grit his teeth, grinding them together hard and clenching Natalie's clothes in his hand.

He swore that he could literally tear that man, someone he knew nothing about, apart. Rip him into pieces solely on the bare facts and the pain he had inflicted on Natalie.

Suddenly all he could hear was the sound of his own heartbeat. It kicked drummed harder and harder until he couldn't breathe, he couldn't even swallow all he could do was watch the figure get bigger and bigger as they crept in behind the boathouse leading onto the dock. They were met with other silent patrol cars waiting for them to arrive.

As soon as the ignition was cut off and Stottlemayer had hopped out, Monk pushed through, almost running up to the gates, those were left open, until he was pulled roughly back.

"Monk!" Stottlemayer hissed, barely audible, "What the hell do you think you're doing?" He clenched Adrian's coat.

"But-but-but Natalie"—

"I know! We're aware, okay? You can't just go burst up there unprotected!" He commanded. Monk adjusted his coat after the Captain released him and cracked his neck, adjusting his seering vision as he peeked through the gate.

Behind him were a small group of police officers assembling, loading ammunition in their guns and Randy and Stottlemayer removing their coats. They put on bullet proof vest provided by the other officers. Stottlemayer approached him with one.

"Put this own." He whispered.

"What-What?" Monk looked at the vest with wide eyes. He merely stared at it shaking his head.

"You want to save her, or not?"

Monk nodded immediately before removing his blazer coat and handing it to the Captain. Randy helped Adrian put the vest on. Randy looked at him for a moment with hesitant eyes.

"Hey, Monk," He offered, pulling out a pistol, "it's not much, but do you…do you want this? Too?"

Monk stared at the gun for a moment. He didn't take it immediately, instantly remembering the last time he picked up a gun was as far back when he shot the man with six fingers and the memories of Trudy came rushing back, however they started to blur –could he kill again, could he truly kill someone else in place for all the misery he endured because he was so in attached with another? Could he take it again?

"Yea…"He whispered, grasping it, allowing his fingers the flow over the grits and groves on the handle. Yes, he thought, he could kill again if it meant saving Natalie –she was all he had now since Trudy had left…

"Good to have you back," Stottlemayer patted him on the back just before they moved towards the gates. All the officers were bent down, creeping slowly behind Stottlemayer and Randy. Monk was just behind them, shaking in his shoes and sweating with the handgun trembling in his hand. He started to hear his heart throb again, just like it did once before when he tried to save Trudy. He swallowed hard when they rounded the gate. All he could focus on the burning hatred boiling in his viens as he saw the man flick a cigarette out and stand above the cage.

"Put your hands up, Grim! We got you!" Someone suddenly yelled. Probably one of the other police officers.

Grim smirked to himself and pulled his gun out of his pocket, cocking it slowly. His back was facing them. He was ready for this; he thought to himself, he always knew he'd never be taken out without a fight…or without finishing a job.

Captain Stottlemayer, Disher and Monk came up the dock now, the rest of the officers stood behind and aimed their guns at Grim.

"Turn around with your hands up Grim! We know you've got Natalie Teeger!" Randy pronounced.

Grim turned slowly around with only one hand raised the other rose slightly aiming it at the Captain and Randy approaching, Monk remained behind them with his gun raised as well. He was trying very hard not to concentrate on the cage, not the think of Natalie crammed in it, he tried so very hard to keep his anger at bay –to keep himself from shooting the man but his patience was ticking away like a time bomb. He kept adjusting his vest.

"You got me Mr. Officer," Grim lowered his weapon a little, nodding his head mockingly, "or…" He said, backing up a little. Stottlemayer, Randy and Monk were almost fifteen feet from the sadistic man when the saw Grim lift his back foot slightly. "do you...?"

Stottlemayer halted them.

Grim started to laugh hysterically.

"Don't make a move Grim! We have you –you don't really think you'll"—

"Aw hell! You're making this too easy Mr. Officer –you see? You think you have me but you don't. Hehehehahaha!" He laughed swiftly kicking up his back foot and shoving the cage off the side of the dock. It went tumbling off and splashing into the cruel, black waves.

Monk's eyes widened and he lost it instantly. The only thing that had been keeping him sane since the last five years of his life, the only person who knew him inside out, was now dashed to bits into the dark and cruddy sandbar below him. Adrian dropped his gun in a panic. He heard nothing, nothing at all except the beating of his heart and someone, a delicate voice commanded him to _run_—it was Trudy.

"Natalie!" Adrian yelled, pushing through Stottlemayer and Randy.

"MONK!" Stottlemayer yelled.

Grim started laughing as he saw Adrian running fast and furiously toward him and he raised his weapon. He pulled the trigger, knocking a swift shot into the air. The bullet plunged into the flesh of Monk's right shoulder. The blood started to gush but Adrian didn't even feel it. All he could feel was his heart exploding in his throat, all he could see was the end of the dock and all he could hear was Trudy's voice commanding him to _run_.

To his left he saw Grim approaching him. He dodged him just in time as he heard another array of fires shot from behind him. It knocked Grim on his back and Adrian merely jumped over him and into the dark, murky water.

"Monk!" Stottlemayer yelled out, running full speed to the end of the dock. Stottlemayer couldn't believe it. His best friend had plunged himself into the water and perhaps killed himself in this flimbsy attempt. He didn't register it at first and urged Randy to keep Grim down on the dock as he looked over the edge. There was no sight of Monk and Stottlemayer started to pull his vest off in extreme fear.

Randy signaled for the other officers to come and they all dashed forward.

"You see him?" Randy asked.

"God-no!" The Captain said frustrated as he was having a hard time taking his vest off.

The waves engulfed Adrian as he sunk into the freezing waves but all he could do was reach, as he was underneath the water, with his hands out. He kept telling himself to kick his feet but he pushed downward. He dared not to open his eyes but as the seconds passed and he felt nothing of the steel cage he lost hope.

He allowed his eyes to blink a little and saw that the light from the lonely dock lamp penetrated the dirty salty ocean water. He looked around and found lures were pinned on something just below him. They were sinking fast and the light was fading.

He sunk deeper and tried to tread with his hands but his right arm was throbbing painfully. A hot sting was jutting up and down his arm but he pushed through it, grabbing toward the reflecting lures until he grasped the cage.

He pulled hard with his left arm and tried treading up but found that it weighed too much. Adrian started to panic finding that he was losing air and his strength was diminishing.

_I'm sorry Natalie, I'm sorry Natalie, I'm sorry Natalie_, Monk repeated over and over again in his head as he tried treading upward again but the dead weight of his numb right arm was too weak and his lungs started to fill up with water. Trudy's voice started to penetrate Adrian's train of incoherent thought, she kept pushing him to _tread_, pushing him to _pull up_.

"Captain!" Randy called as he saw the Captain dive into the water below the dock.

Stottlemayer treaded deep pushing his arms out in a breath stroke until he bumped into someone. The Captain opened his eyes and saw that Monk was struggling to pull Natalie up with him. He panicked again and swam underneath Monk and grabbed the cage as well. He pushed Adrian up with him.

They broke above the water and Adrian started to choke.

"Natalie-Natalie, where's Natalie-get her-get her, she needs air-she needs"—Monk choked in between breaths as he struggled to tread against the cage but found that the weight was alleviated. Stottlemayer treaded beside him, lifting the cage above the water and Natalie's slump body lay against the cage bars, rustling lifelessly in the waves. Her head was above water.

"You son of a bitch," Stottlemayer choked, "Monk! You son of a bitch!"

* * *

Hope you enjoyed it and for all you who were worried for Natalie, I sincerely hope your worries were lifted :) Can't wait to hear from you!


	5. Chapter 5: Part I: Calming the Restive

_DISCLAIMER: I do not own anything (including any characters) from USA's Monk. _

Omgosh you guys, so I totally disregarded the fact that Natalie in fact had a brother and ironically enough, his name was Johnathan. Wow, I honestly can take back now what I said on the disclaimer from the last chapter about owning him but I sincerely made him up on the top of my head, I swear, at least for what his purpose was in this story. Oops. So apologize about that. Anyway, well here is your latest installement and I hope you enjoy.

ps. I have horrible grammar and horrible spelling, I am not going to lie. I did check my spelling on my document and my grammar before submission, however, other mistakes may have gone unnoticed. Sorry about that.

* * *

Natalie felt a warm hand rub against her own. Her blurred vision bubbled into view and cast her dead, glass eyes upon a small girl sitting across from her. It was Julie.

"Mom," She whispered, reaching over hugging Natalie, "you're awake."

Natalie couldn't speak. All she wanted to do was cry. _How did she get here?_ All she could remember was smoke…waves, and thunder. Nothing else. Darkness, it plagued deep, so much that her voice, lost inside her throat wouldn't emerge. Her emotions, now fully alive and running freely now, clogged up. All she could do was accept Julie's hug without lifting or moving her body. It was cold, all suddenly, very, very cold.

"Mom?" Julie asked, feeling the stiffness in her mother's touch. She was shied away, like a child when Julie approached her, when she talked to her and as Julie tried to start conversation, the dead silence weighed more than she could hardly bear.

"Why won't you say something? Don't you know me?" Julie whispered, quietly, so very softly and trying to understand why her mother was tearing up. Her eyes were turning vibrant red, her cheeks started to swell as her delicate, bruised and bandaged face fell in a slump. Natalie started to shudder with a pitiful cry.

Natalie stared at her hands, she couldn't allow Julie to see her upset like this but something was making her unresponsive. It was as if she had lost her voice. All that she felt was pain and when she looked at herself in the hospital bed, all casted, propped up like a broken doll and all the IVs pinned into her arm, responsively sputtering her life-line and vital signs, just sunk into Natalie all too quickly; it reminded her why she was here…

Now she recalled when she looked back over at Julie. Just looking over her daughter, with her small, pleading eyes merely reflected Natalie's emotional storm just beginning to whirl and it was already spinning out of control. Now she recalled everything that happened, everything that man put her through, everything she endured –_oh god_, she felt _disgusting_, so _revoltingly untouchable_! But it all came rushing back to her initial question… _How the fuck did she get here_?

"Mom, it's me Julie," She reached out rubbing her black and blue wrists, "you're okay. Mr. Monk saved you."

_What_? Natalie's eyes blinked rigorously through the tears at such a remark –_what_? Mr. Monk _wouldn't_ touch her now with a ten foot pole, let alone save her when she was still covered in dirt and blood. She shook her head over and over again but Julie only responded by nodding.

"Yes. Yes, Mom," Julie whispered, "he did."

Natalie shook her head violently now as she started sobbing harder. She convinced herself _this was just a dream_ –she was still in that cage, still waiting to be knocked in the bay-she hadn't died yet! Why is Grim taking his sweet fucking time to kill her? Couldn't he be simple enough to give a broken woman what she wanted? Natalie now recoiled from Julie's touch. She didn't want her to touch her because she knew if she'd wake up, if this was a dream, then she'd still be sitting…waiting to just die. She put her shaky, flimbsy hands to her head and shook violently.

"Mom." Julie panicked, "Mom? Come on, stop. Stop it. _Please_, stop. Talk to me"—

"Is she awake?" Someone asked. It was Stottlemayer appeared and he peered anxiously at Natalie who was throwing a fit. She was fighting to breathe through her tears and shaking uncontrollably.

"Nat?" Stottlemayer went quickly beside her and tried to help her calm down but she pushed him away, ripping one of the IVs out of her arm.

"Natalie, everything's okay now –do you understand?"

No response. Natalie just pushed herself away from both Julie and the Captain.

"Natalie!" Adrian rushed through the door now. He tried to approach her when Natalie _eyed_ him. Her uncontrollable urge to thrash became worse when Adrian came closer and he recoiled as well seeing that she was crying harder. He felt like he had just take a knife to the throat…He swallowed hard and disbelieving what he was witnessing –was Natalie having a dissociative episode?

"Stop it! Leave me alone! _Let me die_ damn it!" Natalie's voice finally emerged when she saw Mr. Monk before her. It was like icing to the cake, she could hardly take Julie looking at her the way she did, when she kept saying she was alright when she knew perfectly well she was only dreaming, and then the nerve of the Captain to come bursting in too. He even tried telling her she was safe –but now, _Mr. Monk had to come into the dream too_? Why hasn't Grim fucking pushed her in yet!

Suddenly, two nurses came rushing in escorting Julie, Mr. Monk and Captain Stottlemayer out of the room and they were joined by a head nurse who closed the door.

"I'm so very sorry"—

"What's wrong with my mom?" Julie pleaded trying to talk without crying. She was holding up exceptionally well .

"Well, we believe she's may be suffering a mild case of Depersonalization disorder," The Nurse answered sadly, "apparently, she's having a particularly violent episode"—

"What? A what? What did you call it?" Adrian asked anxiously.

"Depersonalization disorder. It's common in most people who have suffered from traumatic experiences. Mrs. Teeger here is believing that she's dreaming. A lot of times when patients are brought home and put into their fimiliar surroundings and are all of sudden overwhelmed by loved ones, they tend to try and cut themselves off from them because they're afraid if they get too attached that's when they'll wake up and be right back where they were." The Nurse explained.

"Do these episodes, as you call them, come and go?"

"You'll have to talk to the doctors," The Nurse apologized leaving them to attend someone else, "I'm sorry, I have to go."

"Captain!" Randy appeared with a doctor stood behind him "I think-I think you and Monk should take a look at this…"

* * *

Well, there's a little indication of Natalie's condition. I tried classifying her condition as best as I could by reading up on some of my old psychology books -and when I mean "mild case of blah blah blah" I truly meant mild. She won't be like that forever, however, thus bring us to the implication of Monk's true feelings for Natalie. Ahh, I can't wait to here from you guys and give you more :) :) :)


	6. Chapter 5: Part II: Unsettling Reality

_DISCLAIMER: I do not own anything (including the characters) of USA's Monk. _

Hello you guys! Um. This chapter is more of an informant of Natalie's condition and what you should expect in later chapters. However, there is implication of Monk's turning point in just how much he cares for Natalie. I hope you enjoy, and as always, I want to apologize in advance for any spelling or grammar errors.

* * *

The doctor carried a beige file and lead Monk, Stottlemayer and Randy into a private room. In it was a large oak desk, with a nice sleek varnish finish and it shined brightly from the sun peeking in from the windows. Across from that were a couple cushioned chairs.

"Please sit," The Doctor offered, pushing his glasses up the bridge of his nose. He didn't keep their eye contact for long as they sat themselves. They were facing the desk and just above and behind the desk was a light box. The doctor flipped a switch on the right side of it and pulled out various black and white pictures. He set them onto the light box.

"We have gotten the results from Mrs. Teeger's X-ray and gentlemen," He turned to eye them, still shuffling through the file, pulling out a couple more black and white sheets, "from what you told me, after bringing her here, the results are none too settling as well. I do ask if you would uh, bear with me, so to speak so I can explain the severity of her condition."

At the point when the Doctor so graciously announced the word _severe_ it made Monk cringe. He allowed his arm, propped up on the arm of the chair, to grace his temples. He let out a sigh and peered up anxiously at the doctor but now he saw the vibrant display of the black and white figures, which were set up on the light box, to shine down in its infinite monochromatic fury. They were x-ray images of various bones of Natalie…

"Ah, where to begin, um…" The Doctor looked worriedly back at his file and pulled out a few sheets. Probably regarding the exact condition in which Natalie's fragile state was currently in.

"It appears, after Mrs. Teeger was taken it, she suffered from severe trauma. Um. I'm not sure if anything has taken affect already"—

"Um-um yea, here's the thing: it has. She was throwing a fit before we came in here. She said she let me die"—

"Monk," Stottlemayer hushed him, "let him finish. Okay?"

"I'm so very sorry sir; you're her husband I'm presuming?" The doctor asked, apologetically visibly seeing the distress on Adrian's face.

"Well-no. You see she's my assistant and a dear, dear friend and"—

"Oh. My apologies on such an assumption. Uh, ah well, what you're seeing behind me," The doctor continued, turning around and point up to the first photograph, "is Mrs. Teeger's coccyx, commonly known as the tailbone and those darkened areas are implications of severe bruising. Not entirely dangerous but inherently painful. Um, the cause of this could be repeated strain against this bone and from what you told me of her condition when she brought here, it's possible the abuser caused this during his sexual assault. Very, very uncommon, however, it can happen. "

Any word associated with intercourse, and the very mention of _sex_ itself made Monk very, _very_ uncomfortable and he stiffened in his seat, trying to control his apprehension growing with each passing minute.

"So, this bruise, it will be able to fully heal itself?" Stottlemayer asked.

"Yes. Sadly there is nothing we can do for injuries in that area, I mean, we don't make cast for those types of injuries simply because it will basically be immobilizing the entire lower half of the patient. She will need a wheelchair for the next couple weeks following her release from the hospital. The best thing for Mrs. Teeger to do is be careful in how she walks, pays close attention to her posture and be very weary of doing any strenuous activity. " He answered, before pausing and then he pointed to the next picture, "these next bones, if you can't already tell are her ribs. They too are bruised but there are implications that her tissues, surrounding these bones, have been strained severely. This includes the ones surrounding the sternum. These muscles and tissues are called 'intercostals cartilage'. Those tissues help us to breathe normally, allowing our ribcage to expand. Since Mrs. Teeger has somehow strained these, and bruised her ribs in the process, there are blood vessels that have ruptured and leaked blood into the surrounding tissues. We haven't been able to place the cause of this but what I can tell you is that the normalcy of this type of injury is usually done with extreme twisting, or forceful twisting, of the torso"—

"He put her in a cage only a little bigger than a standard crab baiting cage." Adrian interrupted.

"…uh, -wha-what?" The doctor's brows furrowed. He turned to look at the x-ray again.

"Well, that very well may have done it for her. God, excuse my language gentleman but _Jesus Christ_, a regular fishing cage like, what- two feet by two feet? What the hell is this world –never mind, I'm sorry. Very unprofessional of me, I apologize." He cleared his throat, adjusting his glasses and going through some more sheets, "Well, yes. Mr. Monk that could have been very well the reason for the straining. Um, okay, if you'll take a look at the next couple pictures they're various bones in Natalie's hands and fingers, including her wrist. Nothing is broken, thank-goodness but in pattern with the last couple injuries I've shown you, they're bruised and extremely fragile. Her wrist, both actually, in particularly, were on the verge of fracture. I'm assuming, since myself and some of my fellow colleagues here believe that she was bound by her hands, rendering her immobile. There are some lacerations in her wrist from whatever she was tied in. It basically crippled her fingers and cut off most of her circulation. That's why, if you haven't already seen her bandages, and areas about her hands, are bruised and blotchy and pale. Um, which also brings me to tell you probably the most important part,"—He paused, pulling out some more papers from the file. He eyed them warily.

"She was tested for various sexually transmitted diseases and thankfully, she hasn't contracted anything. Nothing. She is absolutely clean, except for one thing…" He paused, taking his glasses off for a moment, "Mrs. Teeger does however have both vaginal and anal tearing."

There is was. The bombshell that rendered Adrian to grind his teeth together and clenching his fist, however, he remained calm and collected, merely staring empty eyed at the Doctor. It was expected, he knew, Adrian wasn't oblivious to the fact that Grim was a sexual fiend, and he wouldn't put it past that son of a bitch to inflict such pain in Natalie. However, hearing the Doctor finally give his diagnosis of it made it all _real_; it made it _even more painful_ for Monk to fully understand that his dear assistant, his best-friend, a loved one had endured probably the most grueling, tiresome, and upsetting experience of her life. _God_, Adrian put his head in his hands, _I hope he is burning in hell for this_.

"It obvious she was raped during her abduction. She has bruises all alongside in her vaginal walls and –anal passages," The Doctor paused again, noticing how dry and cold it felt in the room all of sudden, "I am so very to deliver such news to you gentlemen, I'm sure you're all very good, and close friends of Natalie and I hate to tell you these things. It's horrible and she's probably the worst case scenerio in this sort of thing. It's imperative that you keep talking and communicating with her in this process. She's not going to just wake up tomorrow and be all hunky-dory so to speak. She is going to need a lot of love and support because although you can visibly see the physicality of her painful condition, lot of the damage that you see here doesn't compare to what's going on up here," The doctor indicated with his finger, he pointed to his head, "She's probably going to be very distant for the next several weeks. She won't act normal, as you can already tell and it's best for men, such as yourselves to keep a safe distance between touching and communicating with her. She's probably going to soon suffer from post-traumatic disorder, which involves relapses or nightmares that replay her experience. She's not going to be entirely the same Natalie you all knew. She's going to have to be nurtured back to that state. Oh, and one more thing, it was concerning your question earlier, Mr. Monk…?"

"Oh, yea, um…well, you see, she woke up and she started crying. She wouldn't talk until I came in the room and when she did she yelled at us. She said, something like let me die?" Adrian was confused and a little hurt recalling the event. "She-she looked at _me_ when she said it."

"Well," The doctor nodded at this point, "Like I said, Mrs. Teeger will suffer from post-traumatic disorders and some of the earlier, immediate stages of this are dissociative episodes. Um, the patient can often either extremely hostile, or extremely depressed and anywhere in between. The fit you probably witnessed sounds a lot like Depersonalization Disorder, although a mild example of it. She might've been overwhelmed to see her loved ones all at once, believing she was dreaming. She might still be convinced she's stuck in whatever situation she was in before you found her"—

"She was in a cage. She was in cage." Adrian interrupted.

"Well, she might be convincing herself she's still in that cage, um, apparently waiting to die. I don't particularly know the whole situation but it's possible she's trying to cut off any emotional attachment between you, or her daughter, or any of you because she's afraid if she wakes up, she'll still be sitting there. It's a sad state to be in. But believe me Mr. Monk, like I said, if you all give her plenty of love and support and get her life back in order the way it used to be, she will recover. I promise. Just give her time to adjust." He explained.

Monk just stared, dead eyed, feeling like his soul had left him and he allowed to in take one more breath before this all finally hit him. Natalie, his Natalie, the woman he knew to come and love –_would_, _God_, he corrected himself mentally, _could_— _she ever be the same_? The sweat was building on his forehead again and his blood was rushing to his head. He couldn't think straight and his eyes burned with fire. He couldn't even breathe. He just stared at the doctor. He couldn't imagine another man taking advantage –forcing himself _on_ her—!

"Alright, thank-you for your time Doctor," Stottlemayer was noticing Monk's abnormal, and quiet behavior from the corner of his eye.

"Um, if you'll excuse us for a moment,"

"Come on Monk, let's go." Stottlemayer whispered, helping his friend off of the seat, and lead Adrian from the room.

"Randy, I'll be right back," He said leaving Randy with the Doctor.

When the Captain had Monk alone in the hallway, he shook him temporarily to shake him out of his sad, upset trance.

"Monk"—

"Why would any man—how can any man do something like that!" Adrian raged loudly.

"Monk-I-I don't know, alright. But look, you can't focus on that, you're going to worry yourself sick thinking about those nasty details –for God sake, Monk, you can't think about that when you look at her. You have to look at her for where she is right now. She's safe. She's got Julie, you, me and Randy and whoever else –just focus on now. Not then. She's here. She's safe. So help her." Stottlemayer looked at Monk in the eye.

Adrian didn't respond. He just stared, fuming and but all inherently sad.

"Monk –listen to me. That man is dead, rightfully so and better him and then Natalie is all I have to say. In my opinion he got what he deserved for doing that to Natalie. Hitting or abusing a woman makes a man less of a human being. And guess what? You're going to help Natalie get better. You've depended on her for so long, now she's going to have to depend on you. So take it and handle her carefully. Jesus Christ –you look awful, almost as bad as Trudy"—

"She's not Trudy. She's _Natalie_. This is different,_ she's-she's_," Monk trailed off thinking of the automatic consequences in his head when comparing the two but something suddenly hit him hard, in the gut and made him stop in the mid breath, mid thought and mid conscience…Trudy was _gone_, she's been gone for almost twelve years, but Natalie, she was _here_. She was here…_Forgive me Trudy_.

"Monk? You okay?"

"Yea-yea-yea—I'm fine. I'm fine." He stuttered, repeating the lines over and over again.

"Alright. You heard the Doctor, now, take care of her."

* * *

Well, there you are for another, hopefully, developing new chapter. I hope you guys enjoyed it. Sorry some of my updates are shorter than others. Anyway, can't wait to hear from you all :)


	7. Chapter 6: Part I: Devotion & Desire

_DISCLAIMER: I do not own anything (includng the characters) of USA's Monk. _

I am sooo very sorry for not being to upate for the last couple days you guys. I have been doing some stuff for college. I'm moving in on the 11th of this month :/ AHH. I'm so nervous ugh. Anyway, I hope you guys enjoy this. It's a little longer update to make up for lost time.

ps. Sorry about all the breaks and time changes in this chapter!

* * *

Julie had gathered her mother's belongings. Her purse was missing but Monk had taken the honors of cancelling credit cards that she recently had or anything billing her. In fact, Julie was astonished to find out that Monk had paid for his mother's stay in the hotel in Miami. He was actually scared for her mother, which I mean, probably was already evident but the way he was acting, running around, making sure she was okay, getting and tending for things in the hospital vaguely reminded Julie of how her father would've been –devasted, kind and renlentess in attending in every little thing for her mother. It was in the moment, when Monk was paying for her wheelchair to escort her out to go home, that Julie felt some sense of love for the man. He was truly caring, deep beneath the callouse strange façade.

"You've got everything?" He asked.

"Yes, Mr. Monk. Everything. You've asked six times already."

"Alright-alright, well –you can drive right?"

"I'm seventeen Mr. Monk. Don't worry, I'll drive us home."

"Okay, okay, good." He nodded taking the things Julie had gotten for her mother. She was wheeling her out.

Natalie hadn't spoken since her stay here. Ever since her fit all she's done has sat, silently, she ate, rarely though and when she did happen to understand when Julie or Mr. Monk was talking to her, she'd only respond is nods or shakes. Her eyes, her glass, frail blue eyes remained unwavered and unmoving, when she would stare at anyone, it was as if she was listening without registering and alive without living. She was a dead hollow shell of what she used to be. It greatly distressed Monk. He tried to talk to her and when he did she only watched him without responding.

When they had reached the car Julie assisted her mother in standing up in upright posture, carefully holding her waist but found that her mother's dead was toppling on her. Monk immidately saw this and came rushing to hold Natalie up. Her weight was suddenly pushed on him and Julie tripped over from the entrance of their car. Monk had inevitably dropped her things and balanced himself against Natalie.

"I'm-I'm sorry."- He apologized eyeing the things on the ground.

"It's fine. I've got it. Can you help her in?"

"Ye-yea yea. Sure. Yea."

Monk looked at Natalie who worriedly was staring at him.

"Um. Natalie, it's me. Adrian Monk. I'm just helping you sit okay?"

She didn't respond, only stared off, almost right through him. That was expected but nonetheless bothered him immensely.

"Okay." He said to himself. He took her waist, cautiously not believing she was allowing him to touch her but none the less, he put his hand under her legs, curing his arm around her knees and lifted her gracefully off the wheelchair . He was nervous in those few seconds handling her because it was almost like handling a child –shy, afraid and soft spoken. She instinctively wrapped her arm about his neck and bent her head under the hood of the car as he carefully set her inside.

Julie meanwhile noticed the tediousness of Monk's hands, the way he flowed when putting her mother in the seat. She leaned over placing her mother's things in her lap. Natalie merely allowed her hands to grace over them and then she stared head, letting go of Adrian's hold on her.

He then attended to the wheelchair, whipping out his wipes and folding it up and putting it in the backseat of the car. He all of sudden heard Natalie whimper. She clutched her belongings, her clothes and everything at her chest and just started to sob out of nowhere. Julie watched her mother cry and helplessly looked at Adrian. His eyes became wide as he shut the back door with the thrust of his clothed elbow.

Something was breaking inside of Mr. Monk, from what Julie could tell and at the moment, Julie felt like crying too.

Natalie ignored their stares and sniffled loudly to herself, clenching her things tighter and tighter, not wanting to peel away from it and Monk just stared, feeling like a suspended ghost at her side, dead and weightless as her tears began to fall all too rapidly.

Monk turned away suddenly, facing the parking lot and when a thick breeze snuck up on him, he watched his wipes flutter from his hands and scamper on the ground. He then tried walking but found that he fell, leaning against the frame of the car. It was like he lost his balanced and he just leaned. He propped his elbow against the car, not exactly knowing what to do next, whether he should buckle her in, whether he should let her cry before closing the door –what could he do? He mentally cursed himself in that moment as he buried his head in the crook of his bent elbow facing the car's back window. He looked at his reflection in that moment and just stared for a few minutes. He couldn't decide what to do, what to think or what to say next. He wanted to magically make Natalie okay again. But what the hell could he do!

All of sudden two very small arm wrapped around Adrian's waist making him jump slightly. It was Julie. She stood hugging Monk close, burying her head in his chest and it was almost by reaction that he hugged back. Maybe that's what he needed next, before he attended Natalie in her crying state, was a hug from anyone who might know just how dearly upset he felt –a hug from Julie was exactly what he needed in that very moment.

* * *

Dr. Bell's Office: A Week Later

* * *

"Natalie won't talk. She hasn't spoken ever since we left the hospital. And she won't leave her room. All she does is cry. Eat. And sleep." Adrian spoke quietly. Dr. Bell observed him carefully.

"Kind of reminds you of yourself, doesn't it? When you lost Trudy, I mean." He inquired.

Adrian glanced at him, seeing the correlation and he nodded reluctantly.

"Yea-yea it does. She's so dead. So hollow. She won't even look at me. It's like I'm dead to her –you know?" Adrian chuckled melancholy.

"Adrian, do you see that Natalie needs comfort? Everyone deserves comfort, even when they don't want it. It's nice to listen to someone ramble about nothing when everything you've ever known has been lost. I imagine she registers you and Julie and knows you both very well but something is making her distant. It's fear. She's afraid of hurt again."—

"But I would never hurt her like that"—

"Yes, that's true! But what I'm saying is that she's afraid of getting hurt in general. Emotionally, mentally, physically –you see? You see how miserable she is? Adrian, compare yourself with Natalie's trauma. Don't you see the need to pull her out of the hole and move on?"

"Heh-yea, I don't like her like this."

"Then think of Trudy –she doesn't want you unhappy forever just because she's gone. So when you're taking care of Natalie, take care of yourself too. Maybe you'll be able to pull yourself out of this mess too just like Natalie."

"Maybe…"

* * *

That Night...

* * *

"Mom, it's time to take a shower." Julie said quietly, approaching Natalie. She sat very still on the couch and just stared blankly at the floor. Julie helped her up and made their way into the hallway. Adrian sat watching closely until he noticed that he had been watching her the whole time.

Natalie, something and somone so precious to him was lost to the world, in a sea of disarray and confusion. Almost like himself…

He had to do something. He saw that Natalie had left the couch untidy and quickly clung to it. He set the pillows in exact symmetrical sequences, picked up all the crumbs left from her plate, and picked up her blankets, folding them in exact right-angled squares and then he started to wipe down the table when he found himself staring off into space when hearing the shower turn on down the hallway. He slumped over hearing Julie talking quietly…

"Adrian," Someone appeared. It was Trudy. She sat across from him near the wooden coffee table. He watched her move toward him looking beautiful as ever, "you are going to help her, right? She's so very upset."

"I am. I have to. But Trudy –I'm so sorry. I've been so focused on her"—

"Ssh. Adrian. I know you have, she's means very dearly to you. I know."

"Trudy I'm so sorry. I don't know why I've strayed like this. But when she went missing something inside me hurt again. Like…like when you"—Trudy's transparent fingers covered his lips.

"I know you care deeply for her, Adrian. It's only natural for you to grow attached to her. She's so very proud and fond of you –just like I was. It makes me so happy to think she's looking after you and caring so very deeply about you just like I did. I would want nothing more that for you to"—

"Trudy, I don't, I can't-I love you!" He pleaded.

"I know you do Adrian, I love you too. But I'm gone. Darling, I want you to be happy again. Please, don't shy away from your feelings for her anymore. Please, all I want now is for you to be happy, again."

"I am happy"—

"Adrian, you're not. Please promise me, you'll take care of her just as she's taken care of you." Trudy whispered just as she disappeared.

Adrian watched her fade and he felt tears leave his blinking and reddening eyes. His mouth agapen and his emotions were strew in the air in tangled lines of light and darkness. He felt like he was caught in a web of desire and devotion, unable to move and too afriad to think outside of the possibility of happiness and comfort.

"I-I promise." He whispered, silently.

* * *

A couple hours later...

* * *

She could feel Grim's breath on her skin, making her hairs stand up on wits end and just when she saw him on top her, Natalie panicked…She moved quickly, in and out of the dream like a ghost.

Natalie screamed painfully, whipping upward now out of bed, soaked in sweat.

Adrian heard her scream. He pounced off the sofa and jolted down the hallway, running into Julie.

"Mom"—

"Go to bed, Julie, you've got school tomorrow"—

"But"—

"I'll make sure she's okay, go to sleep." Monk said, rushing down the hallway. He came in to the threshold of Natalie's bedroom and there she was, curled into a ball and shaking frantically. She was crying and sobbing, wrenching the sheets between her legs and arms. She was clutching and screaming. Adrian came quietly into the room and crawled quietly on the bed.

"Natalie-Natalie," He soothed, pulling the sheets from her calmly, "Natalie –you're alright, it's me, Mr. Monk –you're alright." He pryed her gently away. She pushed away and looked at him dead in the eyes for a long time. He just stared at her, watching her break into sobs again.

"Natalie, it's me. Adrian. I'm not going to hurt you, I promise." He said reaching towards her but she flinched, painfully, shutting her eyes tightly. Adrian didn't move then, he just hung suspended, hurt by her actions at his touch. He never felt so hurt. Usually it was him shying away from her touch.

"Please. Please. Please," She whimpered softly, shaking her head at him,"Stop. Please. Just stop. Stop. Stop. Stop." She started sobbing.

Adrian's eyes both lit up and then dimmed very painfully. She kept mumbling those same words. The way she articulated it made his stomach churn, caught between anger and hatred for the man that put her through this, and hurt; he felt her pain, bleeding from her words. He couldn't decide what to do next. Instead he just sat by her until she cried herself to asleep.

Julie appeared in the doorway and caught something exceptionally rare. Monk was tucking her mother in ever so carefully before he leaned over, as if he was examining her closely. He leaned in a couple times before pulling back but in a final attempt, Monk actually got enough nerve to plant a single kiss on her cheek…

* * *

1:28 am

* * *

He reckoned it wasn't right. Monk couldn't get any sleep after such an action. He felt like he betrayed everything he'd been fighting for with Trudy. It was true, she told him to move on but something was holding him back. It might have been his comfort zone or the simple fact of getting so attached to someone in fear of losing them…and –he did almost lose Natalie. God, he was plagued with riddles.

He got up fetching someone to clear his throat, perhaps kill the parchness drying out his mouth but as he poured him a glass of water, wiping the rim of it, he heard timid footsteps echo on the tiled floors. When he turned he saw Natalie standing there.

She looked confused, staring at him and Adrian was petrified. He remembered what Dr. Bell told him about things like this happening. Natalie could snap in and out of her dissociative episodes and then slip into either an angry or frightened catatonic state. He just watched her approach him. Her hands touched his face and at first he didn't accept the invitation. A light shined in Natalie's eyes, as if she understood… She waited and began to reach for his face again. Monk squeezed his eyes shut and allowed her fingers to graced over his cheeks.

"Mr. Monk," She whispered, "is that you?"

* * *

You guys...I've been so nervous about this chapter. I'm tapping into both Natalie and Monk's feeling and it's just extremely difficult. I'm trying very hard to make them both remain in character without rushing them to fall in love. Ugh. I hope you enjoyed this!


	8. Chapter 6: Part II: Help, I'm Alive

_DISCLAIMR: I do not own anything (including the characters) of USA's Monk. _

This chapter is rather intense only because we start to tap into Natalie's thoughts and reactions to certain things when she "wakes up". (I develop a little with Adrian in this particular update-sorry) Enjoy!

* * *

He nodded impatiently. Feeling the tips of her fingers glide across his cheeks; it was incredibly timid and ever so soft. It made him too entirely uncomfortable.

"Yes-yes," He took her hands off his face.

"It is you." She noticed the quirk of his shyness from her contact. She watched him dab his cheeks and he looked cautiously at her. She became instantly confused and started to wonder if she was really awake. It troubled her to see him so very serious with such deep darkness hanging from his eyes.

"Natalie it's 1:30. You should probably get some sleep."

"I can't. I can't sleep in there. It's too quiet." She looked around rubbing her arms. She couldn't help but to continue running her fingers over her arms. She felt alive but felt incredibly dirty. All she could remember was the loudness of Grim's dark and dank apartment. The subtly of soft waves crashing in the distance, the footsteps of her captor lurking about his room and the rattle of the cage he was preparing. It began to creep inside her again making her shiver violently.

"I haven't slept somewhere quiet in awhile. The last thing…" She leaned against the sink and looked at the drain. She could feel tears coming back. The sudden hit of gasoline pumped into her veins, making her breath hitch and the vision of all his needles, the stacks of sacks of cocaine lacing the dirty floor. She could still visibly see his face looming over her own.

"The last thing, the last thing, the last thing "—She couldn't help but repeating herself over and over again but she just paused. Nothing was coming out. Just her sudden visions of his face, his hysterical laugh, his rough and calloused hands were crawling all over again. Maybe she shouldn't have woke up, maybe she should've just rotted and died in that ocean, anything to keep these memories away. She could feel her body whole tense up.

Monk could see her shaking and her nails digging into the sink top. Natalie's head was bowing forward, and she was starting to sniffle again. He couldn't take if he saw her cry again. He was trying to focus hard on what to say and what to do.

"You don't have to talk about it. Go to bed. You'll feel better in the morning." Is all he felt he could offer at the moment. He was never good at being a shoulder to cry on. He damned himself for not knowing what to do next.

"Oh god," She wheezed, wiping tears from her eyes, "I can't hardly remember anything except what happened in Florida! Mr. Monk. I can't get Grim out of my head. I can't believe -Johnny-Johnny- I was so stupid. "—

"You're not stupid for believing the best of people. You're brother is responsible for it and he's serving time." Adrian interrupted. He coudn't believe how badly she was talking of herself. She had never done that.

"…so I guess you found out why I never mentioned him." She said very solemnly.

"Heh, yea." Monk chuckled. He started to laughed a little more. Natalie turned and eyed him peculiarly feeling so confused and somewhat hurt.

"What's so funny?"

"It's just you…you haven't said a word in almost three or four weeks and then…here you are!."

"What? Three or four weeks?" She looked devastated. She looked around the place, confused and torn._ How long did he just say…three, four weeks_? _What_? She doesn't remember anything. The last thing she could recall was the sound of rushing oceans and dark, heavy sky beating into her body. The cage rattled beneath her and …and…

"You were having a dissociate episode, Natalie." He added quietly, trying to understand her reaction to this. All she did was stare at him agape and confused. Her face remained blotched with reddened and white spots from choking back tears and from constant shivers. She looked like an absolute mess and Monk felt stranded in that tiny kitchen.

"Oh." She looked at her feet and then stared back up at him.

"What happened to me? I mean, after you found me."

"You were…in the hospital for about"—

"You know what," She blurted, covering her face with her hands and turning from him, "Never mind, never mind." She shook her head. She couldn't bear for him to look at her anymore. She felt incredibly disgusting. The way she remembered how Grim touched her made her seem so untouchable. _How can he even stand in such close proximity next to me_? Didn't she appear nasty and used? _I mean –he must've guessed what happened to me -right_? He could never look at her the same way again and the very thought of that made Natalie cringe. She wanted to cry and wanted to be alone at the moment. She started to walk away and glanced at him once more.

Monk watched her in confused footsteps, taking herself back into the living room and she kept worried eyes on him. He suddenly felt as if something was wrong watching her back fade into the living room darkness. He quickly followed, worried that she was going to have a break down and found her suspended there, just standing and staring at the pictures on cabinet stand.

"Natalie?" He whispered, following her.

She could feel his presence so close to her now and she backed away from him once more and approached Julie's picture. She cupped her hand over her mouth, stifling a cry. She was now uncontrollable and started to sob instantly. It was because she couldn't imagine Julie understanding her mother's trauma, what she had gone through and Natalie thought of the obstacles of telling Julie of her experience. What good would come out of telling her child that the world is full of bad people?

"Julie-Julie-does-does she-she"—Natalie couldn't finish her sentence without crying through it. She lost her balance but found that Adrian was close by and was instantly alarmed at her weary and unstable behavior. He allowed her to fall against him.

Natalie felt his hand gracefully hold her up but she instantly straightened her back and pulled away from him. She couldn't let him touch her. She was too dirty for his clean, soft and gentle soul to hold her. She was lower than dirt now, below him, probably not worthy enough to be the trash on the streets.

She hugged the picture for a moment and put it back gently. Wiping her face and turning to Monk. He was alarmed, confused and his eyes were wide, watching her every move.

"My god," She wept, her eyes narrowing into slits. Her brows furrowed together and her face became instantly red, "am I that disgusting to you? Do you really have to-to-to-to"—There she went again, trying to stifle her sniffles, " to-to gawk! Do you?" She lashed out turning from him quickly. She was actually angry!

He was hurt, pricked by the sharpness of her words and it tore holes into every fiber in his being. Natalie has never raised her voice with such viscosity in her words, the thickness of her tearful voice made something break inside of him. He actually wanted to chase after as he watched her leave him to go into her room. But there he stood, completely stunned and he never would've imagined that world could feel so cold in that moment. He would've never imagined how harsh Natalie's delicate and small voice could penetrate his walls like that and Adrian felt his jaw drop when he finally registered the word '_disgusting'_ in the context in which she used.

Did she really think he found her disgusting? _How could she assume such a thing_? He only thought she was vulnerable and needed constant attention but there she went, running from him and shying from him. It was as if the tables were turning –he wanted her to come back, and talk. Give him some attention. He didn't want her to be alone but what he could do now that she had gone ahead and screamed that at him. It made him afraid, suddenly very, very afraid that she might never be the same person again. He cupped his hand over his mouth and stumbled onto the couch.

All he could do was replay what just happened. The way her eyes flashed such anger and such hurt and he could remember how her mouth moved when she said it. It all came rushing back and digging deeper under Monk's skin. All he did was sit there, staring into space trying to forget she ever said that until he finally fell fast asleep, slumped and curled on the couch.

* * *

Natalie crawled into her bed quietly and stared blankly, her eyes filling quickly up with tears, into the ceiling. How could she do that? How could she scream at him like that? God, why would she react like that? Pull away so cold, leave him so alone, leave him in that damned room by himself but something wouldn't allow her to budge. She stayed planted staring and itching with the constant urge to clean. Her body felt used, it felt covered in dirt, lathered in hers and Grim's blood and her entire body ached, crying out to be washed clean but…would she ever feel clean again?

She suddenly got up and walked into the bathroom. She stormed into the room, ripping her clothes off until she was naked and stood directly in front of the mirror. She stood, looked at her body, still healing, various bruised decorating her rib cage, her legs beaten and still fresh with healing scabbed wounds, her hands and wrist still plagued with dark, purple marks from his bounds, her fingers flexing with dysfunction and her face…oh god, her naked and blotchy face just stared back at her. She instantly wrapped both arms around her torso, and she shook her head. How can she allow herself to remain this broken, this untended and dirty? Natalie started to sob again at the reflection staring back at her.

She looked at her hands, staring at her palms, imagining the dirt and blood still dried on them, her fingers and nails were clean but all she could remember of the night that they were full of sweat and tears. She shook them crazily, trying to shake the memory away from them but all she saw now before her was the Natalie still covered in the man's seed, dried and caking on her body, the blood dribbling from her wounds, the dirt from the bed and floor, the sweat curling her untamed hair and the runny make-up covering her face. It was all too shocking and Natalie started to quiver wildly.

"..I'mnot –Dirty. God, I -Dirty." She blurted in one whisper trying to control herself but all she could was weep. Her reflection in the mirror was confusing her reality and dreams. Was she really still covered in grime? Or was it all in her head –did it even fucking matter! She was dirty, she felt dirty –she needed to wash, scrub, do whatever it took to make herself clean. She scrambled quickly, going quickly for the shower.

She practically fell in, leaning against the steel railing, and grabbing her scrub. She turned the dial all the way to the hot symbol and pulling out the knob. It then spewed, from the shower head above, boiling hot water over Natalie's body. She gasped watching the instant steam feeling the air all around her and the burning sensation that was almost unbearable digging and ripping into her skin. She remained still and stifled her cries and gasps. She could hardly take the thousands of needles kneading harshly into her body from the hot, scalding water. Her skin was already red and swollen from the heat but she didn't care.

She started to lather the soap into the scrub and started to rake it hard against her delicate skin. She dug the grooves against her soft, pale skin and whisked it back and forth in a harsh, bold strokes. She started with her arms, breaking skin and bleeding. She hardly felt the boiling water anymore and she continued to go harder, faster and making purple and blue abrasions on her body. She couldn't stop. Something wasn't allowing her to stop, she couldn't help it, no matter how hard she tried to refrain from scrubbing any longer. The mere memory of that man, Grim, hovering and using her made her continue harder and faster, in a never ending cleansing. She would never stop until she felt clean.

There was a terrible weakness in her nature in the moment, a terrible weakness running through her blood and no one was there to save her from herself…

* * *

Well, there you have it. I hope to hear from you soon!

(The next chapter will be longer and very, very intense)*


	9. Chapter 7: Immoral Atonement

_DISCLAIMER: I do not own anything (including the characters) of USA's Monk. _

Alright you guys, I have prepared you for yet another turning point in our little story. It is quite intense simply because it setting up for future disaster...

* * *

Julie woke up to her alarm but something else startled her; it was the running of shower water. The sound was silent and creeping through her cracked door. She remembered Monk aiding her mother in one of her freak-outs last night but that's all she could recall. Was her mother awake? Or was it Monk running the shower?

She pulled herself out of bed and wiped her sleepy eyes before walking out of her room and tip toeing into the living room. Mr. Monk was slumped over and dead asleep on the couch. Julie's hair stood up on her neck and she turned quickly back down the hallway towards her mother's room.

"Mom?" Julie called when she opened the door. It was dim inside in Natalie's room. Her sheets were strewn gracefully; tipping carefully over the edge of the bed and her pillows weren't displaced and disrupted. It appeared like nothing was wrong. Julie glanced at the windows and saw the blinds were still closed but could visibly see the sunlight of a new day peeking through.

The shower beating down in her mother's bathroom became louder when she approached the door. Julie hesitated to come in and she knocked quietly.

"Mom? Are you in there?" She asked.

There was no answer and Julie felt her heart jump. She knocked again hoping her mother would answer. Instead all she could hear was a soft moan.

"Mom," Julie twisted the door knob, "I'm coming in."

When Julie opened the door she saw the floor covered in the clothes she dressed her mother in from last night. The air in the bathroom was chilly and when Julie looked at the curtains she felt her heart beat faster and faster in her throat. She cautiously came closer, lifting her hands to pull the curtains back and she swallowed hard.

"Mom?" She asked as she revealed to herself her mother laying in a slump on the floor. She was motionless but alive and breathing. Her hair was ruffled in a wet mess and her skin was insanely pale, beginning to turn blue. There were scratches covering Natalie's body and deep abrasions stretching all over her skin.

"Mom!" Julie shrieked jumping into the icy water. She tried to pull her mother up but her dead weight was knocking Julie off balance.

"Mom, mom," She tried to say, feeling the arctic water spray on her backside from the shower head, "mom? Mom!"

Natalie merely lifted her head momentarily and looked up at Julie. Natalie's eyes kept focusing and falling in the back of her head. Julie could feel her mother's freezing cold body as she tried to pull her out of the tub but the cold water was hindering her from moving her mother. It was too cold and Julie started to shiver.

"Oh God," She chattered through shivering teeth, "Mom, how long have you been here? Talk to me!" She shouted putting her foot out of the tub and dragging her mother's body out of the tub and falling onto the floor.

Natalie's frozen body only shivered on top of her own and Julie started to quiver from the bitterness of her mother's touch.

Julie finally unraveled herself from Natalie's limp body and fetched towels. Julie was shivering from the cold water that damped her body as she opened the linen closet in the hallway. She grabbed a couple towels and ran back into the bathroom.

Her mother was still lying there twitching and shivering crazily. She moaned loudly when she felt Julie wiping her naked body dry. Her eyes blinked a couple times but she still wouldn't move.

Julie panicked suddenly after her mother was dried off and still felt her cold, stiff body.

"Mom? Mom!" Julie kept shaking her mother to register her, or wake up but nothing was working.

"Oh my God," She whispered, looking at the shower, "Oh god." Julie quickly turned off the knob and the rushing water hitting the tub came to a halt. There was complete silence except for Natalie's labored breathing and chattering teeth. She still lay, naked and quivering. It looked almost like she was convulsing and Julie started to shake with fear. She rushed out of the room and down the hall.

"Mr. Monk! Mr. Monk!" She screamed when she entered the living room.

Adrian's eyes blinked open by the sudden burst of Julie's voice. She stood over him, shaking him to wake up and he panicked seeing she was wet. Her hair was dripping with cold water and he sat up, still a dazed out of his slumber.

"What-what is it Julie? Where's Natalie?"—

"It's mom. She-I-She's-Something's wrong. I"—Julie couldn't formulate a sentence. She was scared and shivering crazily. Adrian stood up at this point and could feel fear rising from his stomach, making him gag.

"What's wrong?"

"She was in the shower. It was-It was fr-freezing co-cold. I don't know how long she's been in there but she's –something's wrong. She's cold. She won't talk to me. Where are the blankets!" She stormed around the living room looking for the blankets when Adrian pulled found them for her.

Julie took them and rushed down the hallway. Adrian quickly followed after her and storming into the room behind her. Julie opened the bathroom revealing Natalie's naked and slumped figure lying on the floor.

When Monk looked inside, not fully prepared for what he was about to see, his initial response was a spastic twist of his neck and body. He immediately looked the other way, facing Natalie's bed. He covered his face with his hands trying to remove the blurred, naked glance of Natalie's figure but found that his fear for her life was causing him to twist between his conscience and the fear of her lack of decency. He rubbed his hands over his temples, closing his eyes and trying to concentrate on the current problem.

"Mr. Monk-Mr. Monk!" Julie called as she finished wrapping her mother's body in the blankets.

"Julie-Julie here's the thing: I absolutely cannot"—

"Don't worry. She's wrapped up! Help me pick her up!" Julie shouted impatiently trying to move Natalie on her own.

Monk instantly turned back around and took everything in full view. Natalie's cold body lay wrapped and entirely covered in the beige blanket. Her face was whiter than eggshell and her cheeks were turning almost rosy-purple. Her lips were trembling so rapidly, and her jaw was constantly jittering up and down; her teeth crushed together in her mouth making a constant rattling noise. Adrian felt his heart drop into his stomach and he bent over quickly checking her pulse. It was _too_ slow…

"Oh god," He whispered trying to regain his composure, he quickly pulled Natalie's limp body in his arms, "she's going into hypothermic shock."

"Hypo-what!" Julie covered her mouth.

"Julie-Julie!" He struggled, pushing Natalie's body into his arms and he stood straight, "I need you to call the Captain. Go call now. She needs a doctor. Go!" He rushed her out of the room and gently placed Natalie onto the bed. She was mumbling something; it was too slurred and incoherent that Monk started to feel himself lose control over the entire situation. This was his fault he blamed instantly. It was his fault she was like this!_ Why wasn't I there_? Why the fuck hadn't he bothered to check on her? _God_, he fumed mentally, _why had I fallen asleep_!

_Jesus Christ_, he thought, _how long had she been in there_? _Why would she wash with cold water_? He then noticed the scratches covering the side of her neckline. They were deep, swollen and red, following down to the course of her chest. He couldn't bear to lift the blanket back to see if there were anymore.

He shook his hands out, trying to flick away the present problem but he finally gave up and lost his control. He lifted Natalie against him and peeled the blanket away saw the scratches and abrasions covering her entire backside. His eyes widened. He gently pressed his warm hand over the thousands of tiny scores decorating her beautiful skin. It was like touching a rigid ice cube and he rubbed softly over the sores…_Where did they come from_? _Did she do this to herself_?

The riddles plagued his mind as he covered her back up and walked into the bathroom. He could hear Julie talking on the phone in the other room but paid no attention to it. He looked on the floor of the bathroom and saw Natalie's clothes tossed in inconsistent piles. He glanced at the mirror and saw dried condensation covering the glass reflection. _So_, he assumed, _she didn't initially take a cold shower_.

He looked into the bathtub and saw the scrub covering the drain. It was still fresh with soap but _where was the soap_? He narrowed his eyes as he looked around and found a slither of what was left of the bar of soap underneath the scrub.

"_My god, am I that disgusting to you? Do you really have to-to-to-to- to-to gawk! Do you?" _

Came rushing back to Monk as he stared blankly at the scrub. He could still visibly see Natalie's angry and hurt eyes still burning through him, still scrutinizing him and still cutting into his chest. His heart ached with the sheer memory of her voice yelling at him.

All his initial confusion came flinging back with such velocity it knocked Adrian's wits' ends to dust. _She actually thought I thought she was disgusting_? _Did she really try scrub off the memory of what happened in Florida_? _Oh God, Natalie, you could never disgust me_, he shook his head as he knead the butt of his palms into his eyes.

He walked quickly back into Natalie's room and sat beside her as she twitched and shivered on the bed.

She needed warmth and she needed it fast. He pulled her closely into his arms, trying desperately to warm her cold and stiff body. She felt so cold, so distant despite how close she was as leaned in the crook of Adrian's neck. He started to rock back and forth and tried to lend her some of his body heat. Even through the blanket he could feel her chilled temperatures sink through. It made him shudder slightly as he hugged tighter. Her cold, damp head soaked through his buttoned up night shirt but he couldn't care. He just rocked back and forth slowly.

He heard Julie come bursting through the room.

"He's on his way." She said out of breath. Julie saw that Monk was holding her mother closely and he turned to see her standing there. He didn't stop rocking, he merely nodded.

* * *

Florida Correctional Institute

* * *

Jonathan Davenport sat lonely in his cell, staring blankly at the telegram he had received a couple days ago. It was informing him of a telephone session he was scheduled to have today at exactly one o'clock PM. He didn't know who it was from but it was posted as urgent. He prayed to god it wasn't Natalie, he could never face her head on like this. He was too afraid to say sorry. It was better to just stay away from her for the rest of his worthless life.

He approached the tiny booth and looked forward to see a dark man seated on the other side. He was concealed behind the glass wall splitting the visitation booth. But when Johnny came closer and closer he noticed the man slightly resembled Grim. His dark expression made Johnny freeze in mid-motion. His foot was lifting but he stopped and turned to see his escort. Something felt terribly wrong about his so called visitor. It felt more like a trap.

"Fifteen minutes." The man said pushing Johnny forward. _God_, he thought, clenching his palms, _fifteen minutes of glorious hell_.

Johnny was stunned. He knew he that the visitor had requested to speak with him. It was supposedly urgent; however, he had no idea who it was. Now he knew…and he was suddenly very, very afraid.

* * *

Well, well, well -looks like something else is starting to unravel beneath Monk and Natalie's noses. Stay tuned for the next installement. Can't wait to have your opinion!


	10. Chapter 7: Immoral Atonement Pt II

_DISCLAIMER: I do not own anything (including any characters) in USA's Monk_

* * *

When Natalie's eyes fluttered open she saw that she lying in a hospital bed. It wasn't an emergency room, just a regular room and when she looked around she didn't see anyone.

_Ugh_, her head ached tremendously as she sat up, _my god_, _what happened_? She wondered for a few minutes, scraping the inside of her mind for any recollection of how she had ended up there. She looked down and saw that her body was wrapped in an off-white heated blanket and its dial was set all the way up. She stared at it for long, draw out moments, trying hard to remember…then it came rushing back so suddenly.

The water came splashing through Natalie's broken and incoherent memory, staining her eyes with blistering arctic chills, and her body shuddered heavily. She pulled up the sleeves of her attire and stared at the swollen marks she had carved so delicately into her skin and remembered why they were there… Natalie sunk back and held herself tightly.

_How'd she get here_? Disappointed, Natalie sat by herself, feeling as helpless as ever. She couldn't stay like this forever; she couldn't depend on herself to get over this because it was imperative that she rely on others around her. She knew she needed help to crawl out of this mess.

It was almost as if for the first time ever, that she felt somewhat home -back in San Francisco; for a long time it didn't feel like home, it felt a like nightmare**;** taking and dragging her into hell, forcing her mind to relapse between reality and dreams. Even if she had maimed herself it felt good to know that she wasn't in Florida, she wasn't in some else's bed and she wasn't being hurt by someone else. Maybe it was because she had inflicted such pain on herself that made her realize that she was awake, breathing and alive.

"Mom?" Julie suddenly appeared in the doorway holding a bagel.

Natalie glanced at her and nodded to her, "Julie, hey baby," she said quietly encouraging her to come in.

Julie stared at her mother, shell-shocked by her mother's instant reply. She hadn't heard her speak yet and was caught stunned and staring at her.

"Are you okay?"

"Sure**,**" Natalie answered as she watched Julie seat herself adjacent from her. They only watched each other for long moments as Julie ate her bagel.

"What happened?" Natalie asked haphazardly feel incredibly tongue-tied. It wasn't like her to feel out ofplace in the same room with her daughter but it felt like years since she'd seen her. Natalie was beginning to feel uneasy all over again.

"You tell me," Julie said quietly, "I found you in the tub with the cold water going."

"Oh." Natalie looked down at her palms and pressed them together. She glanced back up at Julie who only stared back, trying to understand her mother. Her eyes were wide with worry.

"I-I was taking a shower and-and I don't really know. I guess…I guess," Natalie tried to understand herself and what had happened exactly to explain it well enough for Julie. She never finished her sentence.

"Mom?"

"Hmm?"

"Are you okay? I mean, really…are you okay? We found you with scratches all over yourself."

"We?" Natalie perked up suddenly with apprehension building behind the tension of her mouth. Did she mean, we, as in us? As in, her and another person?

"Well-I found you. Mr. Monk helped me after I dried you off and put a blanket on you. You know he wouldn't…"

"I know, I know it just threw me off when you said it like that. I was about to freak out." Natalie sighed with relief.

"Julie, um, look it**'**s not easy for me tell you what I went through and what I am going through. I just want you to know that there are good people out there, wonderful and gentle people. I just got mixed up…"

"Like Dad?" Julie interrupted.

Natalie paused and could vividly see Mitch's beautiful face**;** his smile and could even still feel the warmth of his touch and his kiss. It made her melt and close her eyes.

"Mom?"

"Yes, yes. People like dad. "

A few minutes of silence passed by when Adrian peeked in. He saw Natalie was awake and paused at the door watching her cautiously. Julie invited him in with a casual nod of her head and Adrian nodded back still hesitating to come in.

Natalie watched him with hidden humor**,** seeing the stutter in his movements and noticed that he was very cautious as he sat down.

"Ah," Adrian sighed, looking nervous, "so, you're awake."

Natalie merely nodded and for that moment in time it felt completely awkward. She had never felt this way around the two of them. They were her closest and dearest loved ones and it was almost like she had never met them before. Suddenly, she felt like a complete stranger, searching for the purpose in her life, wishing she had never responded to her brother's proposal because it was entirely his fault that she had been put through his. She gritted her teeth wishing that the silence of all sitting in the room would magically disappear. How could it? What could she say? How could she talk to Julie and find the right words to explain her experience to her daughter? How could Adrian ever overcome his fear of attachment to reach out and listen**;** to comfort her in her time of need? It was driving Natalie into a state of confusion and disarray and there she sat, completely quiet, afraid of her own silence.

"I'll be right back, I have to p …use the facilities." Julie announced exiting the room, leaving Adrian by alone with Natalie. He felt incredibly distant despite he was sitting a mere two feet from her. She watched Julie go and continued to stare at the door…

"She has no idea, does she?"

"No. I won't tell her." Adrian perked up hearing the desperation in her voice as he watched Natalie watch Julie's tiny body finally disappear down the hallway.

She turned her attention to Adrian upon hearing him answer her and she just watched him for a moment admiring the privacy of the trauma Natalie had experienced. It was in that single second that Natalie's respect for him grew solid. He hadn't broken any of Natalie's trusts and she valued him so much more for keeping her secret from Julie.

"It wasn't my place to tell her, you can tell her when you're ready…" Adrian added quietly, feeling awkward sitting there with the unbearable silence rearing its ugly head against his wishes. He didn't know what else to say after that but he noticed Natalie staring at him for a long time after he mentioned it.

"Or you could…"

"You're such a good man," **s**he interrupted suddenly, smiling a sad and unproductive smile, "You're right, I would like to tell Julie in my own time." It temporarily discarded Adrian's troubles until silence crept between them once more. Adrian found himself admiring Natalie's incredible strength in dealing withall of this by herself. By no stretch of the imagination would he ever be able to understand the horror of what it must have been like to be taken advantage of like that but he surely knew the anger and hatred that boiled in his veins every time he thought of that man touch her like that. He couldn't even understand how any man **c**ould maim someone so beautiful and magnificent as Natalie. She truly was a most stunning woman inside and out. He studied her face as she glanced at her arms, rubbing them softly over the sores that painted her delicate**,** smooth skin.

"Do they hurt?" he asked suddenly, feeling curious as he surveyed the bumped and irritated flesh that rose in rigid flares. They made him so uncomfortable.

"Not anymore**,**" **s**he answered.

"Natalie," he asked, groaning with discomfort, "why did you do it? Why would you…"

"You're asking me? Coming from someone who has always been afraid of germs? Someone who doesn't like feeling dirty?" **s**he snapped, trying to refrain from formulating an argument with him. She didn't know why she insisted on being so cold towards Mr. Monk but there was something so terribly uncomfortable about his question**.**

But when Natalie saw him rub his temples and rest his head in his palms she felt worse for saying those things to him. He couldn't bear to look at her. Why has she insisted on being so ill-acting towards him? He understood she had gone through hell and back and it was expected to have baggage lingering but _my god!_ He breathed in very deeply. _Was_ _it really necessary to be so mean_?

Natalie watched him cower away from her and she unexpectedly apprehended the meaning of such a question. It wasn't to invade or disrupt Natalie's integrity**.** **I**t was because he cared! She took this revelation so very wildly to heart that it made her chest burn with butterflies. _Oh gosh_, she thought, _he really does care_…

"I'm sorry," she whispered, "I didn't mean it**,** Mr. Monk, I just…. I could still feel him on me. So I scrubbed and scrubbed until I was too tired to move anymore. I didn't mean for any of this to happen. I just couldn't get the feeling of him off of me. I don't expect you to understand what it's like to go through…to go through someone doing that to you but**…**"

"But you thought that I thought you were disgusting!" he interrupted.

"Don't you?" She asked the golden question, not that it really mattered; or did it? Could it really be what drove her to clean herself so viciously for the mere approval of her boss? All because of Adrian's opinion of her; the darkness of such a mysterious and deep secret started to unravel itself at that very moment**;** the moment when she realized that she cared so very profoundly for him…

"No! How could you think that, Natalie? You're more than my assistant, you're my friend**. ** Someone that I love…" He stopped himself suddenly, almost slipping on an unconscious demon that surfaced for the first time and it baffled him**,** but he continued, "uh-uh-uh, that I-I care about."

"So," she said, not picking up on his slip of the tongue, "it's still a two way street?"

Adrian for the first time smiled at her**,** feeling warm and comfortable inside. His chest heaved with such glory that not even he could harness it in at that moment because it was as if his Natalie had come back to life with such a simple but meaningful question.

"Yea, it's still a two-way street," he mused.

* * *

Florida Correctional Institute

* * *

"Do you know who I am?" The man asked into the receiver, staring straight into Johnny's eyes. There was a certain anger replicating from his rounded, charcoal stare. It was cold, and ill-willed, merely reflecting evil itself.

"No-no, I don't."

"I'm Randy Jones," He said, watching Johnny's eyes widen.

_Oh fuck_, Johnny cursed under his breath, _it can't be_. He stared at the man before him now piecing it all together. It took him back to the past, as if staring through a clouded dream, and bringing Grim's face to life.

When Johnny first introduced himself to coke, it was all because he was established to a chain, rather a family, of dealers. Grim was one of several, well-known, leaders of the business, negotiating all necessary attractions for slum students or college drop outs and any other fucked up kid rounding the streets in Miami.

Jonathan could now place it, the exact memory in which that frightened him the most when encountering the man before him, it was because Grim was just a nickname for his former, now dead dealer, all drug dealers had one but his real name was in fact Gather Jones…

"Did-did you say Jones?" Jonathan asked.

"That's right. I'm Gather's brother, you know -Grim. The one you fed to the police. Wanna know why I'm here?"

"Not really"—

"Well either you tell me what I want to know or I'll have some of buddies, roomed with you here, give you a piece of my mind for me instead –you wanna go that route?" He growled into the receiver.

Johnny hesitated for long moments not knowing how to answer…He reluctantly nodded.

"I want the name of the officer that you squealed my brother to so I can kill him with my bear hands."

* * *

I know it's been long and I apologize a thousand times over it you guys. I've been boggled down with so much work here at school I've hardly had time to myself much less to anything else, however I want to save this for last because it's something exciting I've been meaning to share with you guys. It's basically a playlist I've made for this story and you can access it by this link " .com/ " . It'll be updated periodically with new songs as later chapters develop. If you have trouble go to my profile on here (fanfiction) and click on my homepage link and it should take you right to my livejournal) I hope you enjoy and please don't forget to review.

Again I am so very sorry you guys with delayed update!


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